Reflux.

Oh, where to begin.  This has certainly been the biggest struggle for us.  Within the first few weeks of Will's life, I started to question whether or not he had reflux or maybe even a food allergy.  He spit up a lot.  Since I've never had a baby before, it was hard for me to know what "a lot" of spit up was and what was a normal amount.  There were other signs that made me wonder, too.  For example, when he would burp or spit up, he'd let out a cry after, as if it was painful.  I could also hear the milk come back up and go back down even though it wouldn't always come out.  Other factors: he would cry, scream, choke, gag, gasp for air, whimper, spit up while eating, arch his back etc at every feeding.  I could see the pain on his face.  Every time I'd bring it up with his pediatrician, she'd say he was gaining weight really well, so she didn't want to put him on medicine, as meds are saved for extreme cases where the baby isn't thriving and gaining weight.  (I completely agree.  I don't support unnecessary medicating, especially for a baby.)  She wanted us to try "reflux precautions" and see how he did.  Those precautions included tilting his crib mattress, not putting him in pants that put pressure on his belly, keeping him upright 30-45 min after every feeding, doing shorter and more frequent feedings, and limiting dairy in my diet.  At his 2-month check-up, I brought it up again because the week before his symptoms seemed to have gotten worse, and we had been doing all of those things.  She said he's halfway there (I guess it gets better in most babies by 4 months), so to see if we could make it without meds.

I was back a week later.

I could not take the look of pain on his face anymore.  I'm the one who sees that look every time he eats and has to hold him and try to comfort him when he's crying and in pain after he eats.  It had gotten worse.  The amount of spit up I'd see on his sheets started to make me mad.  I was tired of everyone trying to make me feel like I was overreacting and that what he was going through was totally normal.  I took him in to see the doctor with a purpose.  Good thing.

He'd lost weight.

FINALLY.  Some actual proof supporting what I had been saying for almost two months.  Don't get me wrong, I am not at all happy that he lost weight.  I'm just glad that there was finally something to show the doctor (and everyone else, for that matter) that I wasn't overreacting.  That there was an actual problem that needed to be addressed before it got any worse.

His pediatrician also heard how congested he was, which is apparently another symptom of reflux.  She gave us a prescription for Prevacid because she thought it was severe enough that Zantac wouldn't work.  I thought we were on the road to recovery...until insurance wouldn't cover Prevacid.

Or any. other. acid-blocking medicine.

So, we had to try Zantac first.  In order for insurance to cover anything else, he'd have to "fail" the Zantac.  We had to go a full 7 days of giving him a medicine that did nothing to help him.  It was so frustrating.  It still is just writing about it!

Finally, we were able to get insurance to cover the Prevacid.  The doctor said it could take anywhere from 3 to 7 days for us to see any improvement.  So I waited.

After the first week, I noticed that he started throwing back up the Prevacid anywhere from 3 to 7 hours after I'd given it to him!  That really seemed weird since it should be long-gone out of his tummy after that many hours.  And after two full weeks on Prevacid with no improvement, Will introduced me to projectile vomit.  That was a new experience!  I thought I had seen projectile vomit from him before...no, sir!  I just sat there and laughed.  I was already planning on calling his doctor that morning, but I didn't delay after that.

We went that day.  He had only gained 2oz in 3 weeks.  So my sweet baby boy who had been gaining weight so well had suddenly dropped to barely gaining at all.  His pediatrician ordered an upper GI and referred us to a pediatric gastroenterologist.  We had the upper GI the next morning (yesterday).  He did really well, considering he couldn't eat for 4 hours before the procedure and he had to drink a bottle of barium.  He couldn't taste it, he was just so glad to be drinking something!  He only got upset when the nurse stopped letting him drink the barium. :)  Praise the Lord, they didn't see any blockages in his stomach or esophagus!  The radiologist said they wanted to measure how bad his reflux is.  All it took was one time, and she said his reflux is severe.  Tell me something I don't know.

I haven't heard back from his doctor yet with the official results.  Hopefully I'll hear something tomorrow.  Our appointment with the GI isn't until May 27th.  I know it's just over a week away, but it seems like a lifetime when I think of how many more feedings we have until then...

I forgot to mention that the day after Mother's Day, I officially went dairy and soy free to see if that will help him.  I know it can take 2 weeks for the dairy protein to get out of my system, so I'm not there yet.  Maybe by next week we'll see some improvement.  I sure hope so.

I'm certainly keeping things in perspective.  I am thankful that all we're dealing with is reflux.  There are thousands of parents out there who deal with much worse issues than reflux.  I'm thankful for my overall healthy baby boy.  No matter how big or small the issue may be, a parent never wants to see their baby in pain.  Period.

And P.S. I know that reflux is very common in babies.  I was never worried that something was horribly wrong with him.   I just wanted his issues addressed, and ultimately fixed.

I'm ready for some relief...for both of us.